5 Tips For Discipling Your Au Pair Kids

Hey Au Pairs!

One of the most difficult aspects of au pairing can be discipline! Your au pair kids might be sweet, but even sweet children can have temper tantrums! If you’ve never had to look after children, this may be a bit overwhelming! Disciplining may seem harsh at first, but it’s something that needs to occur so that your au pair kiddos know you mean business!

Here are 5 tips for discipling your au pair kids:

1.Get the parents to back you up

Having the parents on your side when it comes to discipling makes everything WAY easier, as the kids know that the parents support you. As an au pair in Spain, my host parents let the kids know on my first day with them that I was to be given the same respect as they gave the parents and that whenever I was with them they were to obey and listen to me. I love that my host parents made this clear to the children because it made any and all discipling matters easier to handle.

2.Speak their language

One of the most difficult things many au pairs experience when looking after their kiddos is the language barrier. As an au pair one of the most common duties you encounter is sharing/teaching your native language the children. It may be that your au pair kid does not speak your native language very well, and this can lead them to feel anxious which then turns into frustration causing them to act out. In moments like these I think it’s okay to address them in their first language and check in with them! This way the kid can express to you what they need/want or are feeling! Edwina and Hanna made an extremely helpful video on some basic French phrases for au pairs that you can check out here.

3.Reward good behavior

One of the easiest things that you can do as an au pair when it comes to discipling is to reward any good behavior that you see your host kids carrying out! Let them know it was kind of them to say please and thank you and praise them for sharing their toys and helping you clean up! You could even consider setting up a good behavior chart so the kids can visually see a representation of their good behavior!

4.Use the traffic light method

One visual behavior chart that I believe works tremendously well is the traffic light behavior chart! Essentially, this is a behavior chart that your host kids can move up and down on as the day goes on. They start everyday off on the green light, but if they start acting out they move up to yellow and if they continue to make bad choices they move up red. If they make any positive changes to their attitude they can move back down to green. I’ve used this with my host kids and they were very motivated to stay on green! It also gave them a sense of pride in letting their parents know they had remained on green all day! This is also a fun craft that you and your host kids can create together!

5.Set limits and remain consistent

Establishing limits and explaining to children what behavior is acceptable in terms they understand truly does help children realize right from wrong. It is also important to remain consistent with them and calling them out whenever they’ve done something naughty. It can be easy to let their behavior slide, but the moment your host kid realizes you aren’t being consistent they won’t take your limits as seriously.

Do you have any other tips when it comes to disciplining? Let me know in the comments below!